Episode 3 – SXT-ing

In today’s fast paced world, who uses their cell phone to actually talk to anyone anymore? A small percentage, that’s all! The world is now used to sending thoughts though txt and pictures. Host Matt Scanlan aka DJ Love Hz gets the low down on communicating though txt-ing and sxt-ing while chatting with Co-Host Jessie Graham, Producer James Rodney and GossipOverload.com correspondent Whitney Tulio.

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Show Transcript

Matt:  Hello ladies and gentlemen and welcome back to Dating Bytes, the podcast about dating in an online world.  I'm sitting in with my co-host Jessie Grim.  How are you Jessie?

Jessie:  I'm good.  How are you?

Matt:  Super fantastic.

Jessie:  That's good.

Matt:  That is good.  I'm sitting here with my producer as well.

James:  Hello.  I'm the producer.

Matt:  James Rodney.  How are you?

James:  I'm pretty good.  I just have a toothpick in my mouth, chilling out.

Matt:  That's fantastic.  And I'm sitting in with our guest today, Whitney Tulio of gossipoverload.com.  How are you Whitney?

Whitney:  I'm good Matt.  Thanks for having me, again.

Matt:  Not a problem.  Glad to have you.

Jessie:  We love having you.

Whitney:  Wonderful.  Because I love being here.

Jessie:  Good.

Matt:  Well, we had a great show yesterday and we talked, we touched on the idea of texting, sexting, sending photos and all that other naughty stuff that can go on without actually exchanging a word, and let's talk about it.  What-

Whitney:  Yeah, let's get into it.  Let's get into the juicy stuff.

Matt:  So let me ask you a question, Jessie-

Jessie:  Yeah Matt?

Matt:  When you get a guy's number how long do you wait to text him, or how long is appropriate for a guy to text you?

Jessie:  I think, you know, we've all heard the three day rule when it comes to calling, but let's be serious, people don't call anymore.  It's all about the texting when you're trying to set up a date with someone or you're just chit-chatting with someone; after you first meet them for the first time.  So I think if I, you know, went out to a bar, met a guy, I would want him to text me the next day for sure, but you have to put in-

Matt:  What if he texts you that night?

Jessie:  If he texts me that night that's cool too, because it's just texts.  It's just casual.  It's very short and sweet.  It's not like it's a call and it's not a hassle.  You don't have to answer it and be like "Ugh, I'm busy right now so I can't answer this phone call".  If you're busy you can answer a text, but this is the thing, you don't want to text back right away.  If you see your phone and it's blinking up and its him, you're not going to write him back right away because you don't want to seem too desperate.  So you give it a few hours.  You make him wait on the edge of his seat a little bit, then you write him back.  And then that will go on for a bit.

Matt:  So there definitely is politics involved with it.

Jessie:  Well yeah, there's a lot of politics and games.

Matt:  Because if you were to rewind the clock about 10 years ago, or even longer, if you were to call somebody that night after meeting somebody-

James:  That would be insane.

Matt:  Yeah, you'd look at the person like-

Jessie:  That means that they were wasted or something or they just wanted to-

Matt:  Oh yeah, or they were creeping you..

Jessie:  Yeah.  Like that's too much.

James:  That's like in that movie with Vince Vaughn and whatever, his regular crew, when he meets this girl, he just broke up with his girlfriend, he meets a girl and he calls her the same night when he gets back home.

Jessie:  No, you can't do that.

James:  And it's just, like, super awkward.  Like, you obviously can't do that.  If it's like, and it used to be, I think, the classic rule was like two days, and then you would call.

Jessie:  Yeah, two or three days.

James:  But with texts I totally see how the next day is cool or even the same night.

Jessie:  Yeah.

James:  Just like "It was great meeting you", something casual.

Jessie:  Exactly.  Yeah, even if the night of you get home or whatever and you have a text and you're like, it just says something like "Oh, I had a great time with you tonight, talk soon" or something like that.

Matt:  That makes a lot of sense actually.  So you think its more appropriate to text nowadays than it is to call.

Jessie:  Oh my gosh, yes, like, there's no, like, once you get to know each other a little bit more then I guess you could call, but I don't even know.  Like, I text my mom.  I text everyone.

Matt:  Yeah.

Jessie:  I only text, you know?  So, I don't really talk on the phone that much, and I don't like talking on the phone.

James:  It would kind of weird me out if a girl called, like, to ask me out or something.  I would be like "Why didn't you just text me?"

Jessie:  Yeah, I think that that, it's just so convenient to text and we're just, the culture that we live in is just so based on Facebook messages and Twitter and texting and stuff like that that texting is just the way to go.

Matt:  Yeah.  Being about to convey a thought in 140 characters or less and you can convey a piece of information.  If you meet somebody and send them a message the next day "Hey, great night last night".  It's not a long conversation.  It's just a few simple words and that's the thing.  If you do call somebody up you're almost, you feel like you need to have a conversation.

Jessie:  And calling up someone up is way harder.  So if you have this easier option to text, why are you going to do something harder when this is way easier?  You can think about what you want to say.  You can be clever.  You can do, you can say whatever you want and you can actually think about it before.  Like, when you talk to someone on the phone you have to be on your toes.  You always have to be talking back and forth or else there's going to be an awkward silence and then it's going to be awkward.

Matt:  OK.  So-

Whitney:  That's exactly why I don't like texting.

Matt:  That's, yeah, I was going to say, that seems to be a lot of upsides and I'd like to hear Whitney's opinions for some downsides of the whole texting relationship.

Whitney:  Oh there's a ton of downsides to texting.  Everyone always thinks that if they're texting someone else-

Jessie:  Oh, most definitely.

Whitney:  Then they have time to think about what they're saying.  They can be wittier.  They can be funnier than they usually are, but exactly, they have time to be wittier than they usually are.  They have time to be funnier than they usually are.  Like, when someone's thinking about their responses for that long, like, they could spend, you know, a minute thinking about it, a day thinking about it before they send you something back, and that's not their natural response.  That's not who they are.

Jessie:  But that reels you in, and then you get to know them afterward.

Whitney:  But when you get to know them you get disappointed because it's not what you were expecting.

Jessie:  Well then, say bye.

Whitney:  Like, if someone's texting me all night the next morning if my girlfriend's like "Oh, so did you talk to him?" the natural response is "Yeah, we were talking about this.  He said this"  blah, blah, blah, but I didn't talk to him.  I typed on my iPhone and pressed send a couple times and then I read some script that came back to my phone.  That's not talking at all.  That's not getting to know someone.

Jessie:  And you also can't tell tone, like, whether-

Whitney:  Exactly.  You're guessing.

Jessie: Excitement. Sarcastic.

Whitney:  I don't like it.  If I wanted to get to know someone, like, he can pick up the phone, he can call me and we can get to know each other.

James:  Yeah.

Jessie:  But texting is so easy to be like "Hey, let's go out tonight.  10 o'clock.  See you at the bar."  "OK.  Bye."

James:  It's a lot less pressure.

Whitney:  But do you want it to be easy for him or do you want him to put in some effort to get to know you and to date you?  Sure, it's easier but why do I want to date a guy who is dating me because it's easy?  Like, put an effort in.  Make it .

James:  It's so much work for guys.  They have to do everything.

Jessie:  Girls do.

James:  Like now you can't even text or we screw it up.

Jessie:  No, you can text.

James:  We have to pay.  We have to open doors.

Jessie:  You have to pay.

James:  We have to call.  What do you have to do as girls?  What do you guys have to do?

Whitney:  It depends.  Like, James, if I was into you and you weren't into me, then I'd be doing the chase, right?  It all depends on which way the party goes.

James:  You're right.

Whitney:  So we have to do that, you know, if it was a guy that we wanted.  The girl that you want, you have to do it.  It's a two-way street.

James:  That's fair.  Yeah, that's true.

Matt:  So what is it, what is appropriate to text about then, Whitney?  Like when you start off a conversation with somebody, what is something that you, you know, do not be affected by these downsides to what can you communicate in a positive manner, and what is appropriate?

Jessie:  You don't want to come off too-

Matt:  Yes, exactly.

Jessie:  Crazy.  You don't want to come off too, like, yeah.

Whitney:  I like to get to know people before I start a texting relationship with them; because if we start off with him asking via text message if I want to go out and him being like "You know, I had a really great time last night" through text message that's how it's going to be the rest of the relationship.  When we fight we're going to be texting back and forth.

Jessie:  Yeah.

Whitney:  When, you know, he has to cancel a date he's not going to call me and be like "Oh, I'm sorry I have to do this".  He's going to be like, you know "I'll shoot her a text.  She'll get it" and that's not what relationships should be.  I think that you need communication.  So once you get to know each other, then you can text casually.

James:  I feel like calling changes the game though.  It would almost make it feel a lot more serious and less casual than it is.

Jessie:  Yeah, and it is all a game.

James:  And I feel like it's become a think where it's like weird where it's like extra pressure if someone's calling you all the time because then you have to go through this conversation.  You can't just cut if off whenever you want.  You have to set apart time, but not everyone's into something like that.

Jessie:  See that's where it gets sticky.

James:  But I see how it seems normal now to just text, over call.

Jessie:  Yeah, but it's personal preference, right?  You never know if the person would prefer to be called or if they prefer to be paged, unless you do one of those things first.

Whitney:  And see, the thing with texting too is that texting gets boring.  Like, I met this guy, I went out with him, and we'd been texting back and forth but it's like we can never agree on a day to meet up because we're both so busy.

Jessie:  The dreaded over texts.

Whitney:  And texting is just boring and I'm just over it and I'm not even writing back anymore.  You know?

Matt:  That makes a lot of sense actually.  Like if, yeah, you've got to, I guess if you delay on anything you're just not excited by it anymore, right?

Whitney:  Yeah.

Matt:  So if you see an opportunity you take it and if not you get delayed and you just-

Jessie:  But text messaging conversations can fade out a lot quicker than me and this guy, for instance, were chatting on the phone then we could actually talk and have interesting conversations-

James:  Interesting repertoire. A giggle.

Jessie:  Yeah.  Just because we can't meet up, but these text messages are just annoying.

Matt:  OK.  So now that we got that out of the way, and we are, let's say you are engaged in some type of a relationship, beginning of a relationship, in the middle of a relationship, long term relationship and you want to get into sexting.

Jessie:  Oh yeah.

Matt:  You want to start sending the dirty messages back and forth.  How do you initiate it?

Jessie:  Well obviously it starts by just being flirty.  So you have to bring it to level one first.

Matt:  Give me an example of level one.

Jessie:  Oh, OK.  Just "Oh, I can't wait to see tonight" or "You looked so good.  I really loved your ass in those jeans."

Matt:  "When I see you tonight I'm going to ravish you" or something.

Jessie:  That might be like 1.5.

Matt:  And then she turns around.

Jessie:  That might be 1.5 right there.

James:  That sounds level 2 at least.

Jessie:  So you've got to take it by the level.  You start at level 1, you go to level 2, you go to level 3.  So level one-

Matt:  How many levels are we talking here?

Jessie:  Oh, I don't know.  We'll see.  We'll figure that out right now I guess.

James:  So what if you're not in any way in a relationship or whatever, because you said those were the options?  What if it's just someone you met recently?

Matt:  Yeah.

Jessie:  Same difference, same difference.  Levels.

Whitney:  But then you kind of have to test the waters a little bit more.

James:  Yeah, exactly.

Whitney:  If you don't know if they are into something like that.

Jessie:  Well that's why you have to go slow.

Whitney:  You don't want to burn that bridge.  Yeah, exactly.

Jessie:  So you start texting normal and then you can throw things in here and there, see how they respond and by their response you can get the idea of what they're into.

Matt:  So when you start getting into it what are you talking about?  Are you talking about sharing fantasies?  Are you talking about actual details?  Are you talking about describing body parts?  What involves, what goes on in a sext conversation?

Jessie:  Well, it talks about, yeah, you can talk about body parts and stuff like that.

Matt:  Fantasies?  Ideas?

Jessie:  Yeah, yeah.  Like, you can say "What do you want to do tonight?" or you can say "Oh, we should"-

Matt:  "This is what I"m going to do to you tonight."

Jessie:  Yes, "This is what I'm going to do to you tonight" or "I want to do this to you tonight" and then they could take it to the next level and you can send a little, you know, boob pic or-

Matt:  That's actually the next piece of, the next topic of conversation is pictures.  How do we send, like, what pictures?  There's a lot of taboo things going on.  Like, you hear about a lot about celebrity gossip with people's phone getting hacked and their photos hitting the internet.

Jessie:  Chris Brown's dick pic?

Matt:  Oh, Chris Brown's dick pic, yeah.

Jessie:  Yum.

Whitney:  Chris Brown, Blake Lively, everybody.

Jessie:  Scarlett Johannson.

Whitney:  Scarlett Johannson, Miley Cyrus.  It doesn't matter.  If you are, OK, here's the thing.  First of all, if you're thinking about sending a nude picture to anyone, whether it's a boyfriend, a girlfriend, someone you just met, someone you want to sleep with, I don't care who it is, you have to consider the fact that it might get out before you send it and you have to be OK with that before you send it.

Matt:  No matter what, it is out.  Like you've already sent it through a wireless network.

Whitney:  Exactly.

Matt:  It's saved somewhere.

Whitney:  Yeah.

Matt:  Somebody has that.

Whitney:  I've had so many girlfriends that are like "Oh, he'll never send it to anyone".  Girl, what if he loses his phone?  What if his friends are going through his phone one day and they send it to themselves?  What if someone-

James:  I can promise you that a guy is going to show at least one friend.

Whitney:  Exactly, exactly.

James:  Yeah.  For sure.

Jessie:  Really?

Matt:  Every girl that thinks that your nudie shot does not get shown to anybody, you're completely wrong.  Start cropping out your head.

Jessie:  Yeah, exactly.  That's the point right there girls and guys.  You can take nudie shots, crop out your head.  Don't put your head in it.  Take a picture of your tits.  Take a picture of your dick.  No face.

Whitney:  That's a good starting place.  That's a good starting place.  But Blake Lively's first round of nudies didn't have her face.  Jessica Alba's didn't have her face.

Jessie:  Well then you can't prove it.

Whitney:  Like, how many people do you know that don't have tattoos, that don't have defining body marks, that don't have pictures, like, if they took a picture in their bathroom and you crop out your head, how easy would it be for someone else to be like "Oh, look at this picture of the bathing suit that they put online with the exact same bathroom, exact same body type"?  Like, even if you crop out your head people are still going to figure out that it's you.

Jessie:  So just do a close up.  Do a close up.

Whitney:  Be ready for it to be out.

James:  It's not necessarily going to go online.  No one cares about Joe Schmo's dick.  Like, if you're just a regular person-

Whitney:  Well how big is Joe Schmo's dick?  Jess might care.

James:  Yeah, OK, but nobody's going to be like "Oh, check out this dick" and just throw it up unless there's a reason behind it.  Like, I don't think you have to worry that much.

Jessie:  But it's just like the fact that your friends and family could see it.

James:  Oh yeah.

Jessie:  That's the thing.

James:  I mean, you don't have to worry about-

Jessie:  That's revenge.

James:  people piecing together background, and like the FBI isn't working on this or anything, but yeah, obviously be careful and don't put a picture. Like, the first one you send, you don't really know this person, probably don't have your face in it.

Matt:  OK.  So what do you do with the photo then?  Like, if you have taken a photo, a nudie of yourself to send it are you erasing that right away?  Are you keeping it?  Are you sending it to multiple people or one person?

Jessie:  No, no, no, no.  You're looking at it and it's just, it's for fun.  It's to spice things up.

Matt:  If you're taking it though, are you holding it onto that photo in your phone?  Are you erasing that right away as soon as you send it?

Jessie:  I'm taking it or am I receiving it?

Matt:  If you're taking it.

Jessie:  Well, I mean, yeah, I'll probably delete it.

Matt:  Yeah?

Jessie:  Because my friends go through my phone all the time.

Matt:  OK.  So if you receive one?

Jessie:  Oh, I'll leave it because I don't care who sees that.

Matt:  Well, then there we go.  This is what I mean.  If you were to erase your photo right away, it's still being saved on somebody else's phone.

Jessie:  Oh yeah, totally.

Matt:  It's still being saved on somebody else's phone for sure.

Whitney:  So think about that Jessie.  How many people just as you said go through your phone that you don't feel comfortable saving that on there and you know all the people going on your phone?  You're not going to let a stranger go through it.  So when you send it to someone else, how many people do they know that you don't know?  How many people go through their phone?  Do you know what I mean?

Jessie:  Yeah, that's true.

Whitney:  Like, I, if I want someone to see me naked, come over.  Come on over, see me naked.

Jessie:  Right, right, right.

Whitney:  Like sexting, yes, definitely good.  Like, I'll sext them to get them to come on over because, you know, I'm naked right now, let's get it on.  If he says "Send me a nude pic", buddy get off your butt, come over and see it.  That's why I'm sexting you right now.  Why do I need to send you a picture?

Jessie:  What if you're in a long distance relationship?

James:  What if you don't want to sleep with him yet?

Whitney:  If I don't want to sleep with him yet, then I don't want him to see me naked.

Jessie:  What if you just want to get them riled up?

Whitney:  I just-

Jessie:  A little foreplay.

Whitney:  There's different ways to do foreplay, though.  Like, if I haven't slept with a guy yet I would not be comfortable sending him nude pictures anyways.

Jessie:  Yeah.

Whitney:  Like Matt, would you send a girl a nude pic that you haven't slept with yet?

Matt:  Well, I almost showed Jess a dick pic today, because she asked for it.

Jessie:  But he wouldn't.

Whitney:  Jessie!

Jessie:  There's the dick.

Matt:  OK, now we're on it.  Let's talk about dick pics.  Girls, what would you rather see, a soft cock or a hard cock?

Jessie:  A hard cock.  Come on.

Whitney:  A hard one.

James:  Sorry, can you guys say that again please?  Say it slow.

Matt:  We just talked about the Chris Brown-

Jessie:  He has a really, really, really big dick.

Matt:  And it was a soft shot, from what we could tell.

Whitney:  Maybe that's as hard as it gets.  Chris Brown, you know, maybe God smiting him.

Matt:  Or maybe that's why he needs to beat women, to get his dick hard.

James:  Or maybe Chris Brown learned how to use Photoshop.

Jessie:  Yeah, there you go.

Whitney:  Yeah.

Jessie:  Or  maybe Chris Brown has a big dick.

James:  Or maybe that.

Jessie:  I think that.

James: I think that.

Matt:  OK.  So what are we doing for, men, I'm going to say this right now, the ladies, they do not want to see hairy cock shots.

Whitney:  No.

Jessie:  No.

Matt:  I know that for a fact.  No hairy cock shots.  And do you know what, I'm probably going to say that, probably gay guys as well probably don't want to see hairy cock shots.

James:  I don't think anyone wants to see a hairy cocks at all.

Matt:  Yeah.

James:  Most people don't want to see cocks, and especially hairy cocks.

Jessie:  So when you're taking a dick pic are you taking it in the mirror?  Are you taking it from above, like lying down?

Matt:  That's a very good question, actually.

James:  That's why we're asking you.

Matt:  What would you rather see?  Would you rather see something from below, like a little-

Jessie:  No, I don't want to see anything from below.

James:  The rising tower, birds eye view.

Whitney:  I say mirror, because then you get a little bit of the body in there.

Jessie:  That's true.

Whitney:  You get a better idea.

Jessie:  Mirror's good.

Whitney:  Yeah.

Jessie:  Because then it's no so bam, in your face, like, it's not like, whoa, dick, right there.  It's like OK.  Body, dick, legs, chest.

Whitney:  And you have a reference point to see just how big it is because if you do it from above or below you can angle that and make it look massive.

Jessie:  It's true.

Whitney:  You know, mirror shot you can see.

Matt:  I was going to say something for reference.  Are you going to hold like a Pepsi can beside to-

Jessie:  No.

Whitney:  No, no, no, no.  That's tacky.

Jessie:  A ruler.  Check it out.

James:  Straight to the facts.  I don't want to know what your dick is compared to something.  I want to know exact measurements.

Jessie:  I want to know just what it is.

Whitney:  Well, have you guys heard of Henrik Rummel yet?

Jessie:  Oh, the swimmer dude?  Oh my God.

Whitney:  The rower, yeah.  Olympic rower.

James:  The dick row.

Whitney:  Hit the podium.  Not yesterday, but the day before, like two or three days ago, I don't know, but he won bronze for America and on the podium, very, very tight spandex outfits you can see his dick and it looks erect.

Jessie:  Yum.

Whitney:  So this hit the internet.  It went viral and now everyone is talking about whether or not this is hard or soft, but people have taken, like, the picture of him with the medal and put the medal beside his dick to be like "The medal is three inches.  This is how big his dick is".  Everyone's trying to measure it and see but he's like, you know, already done interviews with Gawker being like "No, this is isn't".

James:  I'm going to look this up right now.

Whitney:  Do, please do.

Jessie:  He's a smoke show.  I want to bang him.

James:  What's his name?

Whitney:  Henrich Rummel.  Gossip Overload, actually, it was just a site that I write for, we are offering him $10,000 to the charity of his choice, if he proves that that's not a boner because he's been claiming that it's not, so we want to see-

Jessie:  I don't think it's a boner.

Whitney:  Full dick pic letting us know if it's hard or not.

Matt:  That's actually a really good idea, and-

James:  That's a generous prize.

Matt:  To prove that it is his dick, I want a picture, I want the medal, the bronze medal beside it.

Whitney:  Oh definitely.

James:  Yeah, that way we can put a comparison in there.

Whitney:  Yeah, but if you're going to be, if you're going to put something beside it for reference you do need something like that, a stack of Benjamins, a gold medal.  If you're putting a Pepsi can buddy, you that from a loony out of a vending machine.  I want to know that there's cash flow coming in.

Matt:  OK.  So let me ask you ladies, how would you guys go about sending a photo?  Are you guys doing body shots?  Are you guys taking shots of your vag?  Are you taking shots of your tits?

Jessie:  You know, I don't think I'm into the whole vag shot.  I think more body shots.

Matt:  More body shots.

Jessie:  Maybe topless with underwear on.

Matt:  What about suggestive posing or an outfit or something?  Lingerie?

Whitney:  Yeah, maybe lingerie.  Maybe bra and underwear or just topless with underwear.

Matt:  Yikes.

Jessie:  I like the idea of underwear, lingerie, I like that a lot better, plus, if you're doing, like, girls, if you're doing a vag shot and you haven't slept with him yet you don't know what his preference is.  You don't know if he likes it shaved or hairy or groomed or landing strip.

Whitney:  True, true.

Jessie:  If you're sending the wrong type of grooming and you don't know yet, there's a good chance that you're just going to scare him off.

Matt:  Yeah, if you send, like, a razorburned pussy shot to somebody.

Jessie:  Or a hairy, hairy, hairy pussy shot.

Whitney:  Oh God.

Whitney:  One of my good friends-

Matt:  Every time you said that it got hairier and hairier in my mind.

Jessie:  It just kept growing.

Whitney:  That's so funny.

Matt:  Go on.  What were you saying there, Nickie?

Whitney:  A friend of mine, he showed me a nude pic that he received when we were out for drinks one day and he was like "God, you've got to see this".  It was razorburned to the fullest extent.

Jessie:  Ew.

Whitney:  Like, I get it girl.  You are confident, you don't care that you have razor burn, he almost puked up the six beers that he had that night.  He was drunk and he still didn't want to see that picture.  Like, be careful.  You can't send things like that.  You have to make sure, if you don't know if it's going to turn them on or not, don't send it.

Matt:  So what happens if you pic gets out?

Jessie:  Who cares?

Whitney:  Me.

Jessie:  Don't put your face, don't put your face, and just hope for the best.

Matt:  Well what if somebody was to be like "Listen what I found?"  What would you guys do if you were approached and be like "Hey, is this you?"

Jessie:  I'd say "yep".

Matt:  You would admit.  Would you deny it Nicky?

Jessie:  Maybe I would deny and just be like "No" and walk away.  Who cares?

Whitney:  I would shaggy that situation to the fullest extend.  Just "It wasn't me.  That's not a picture of me, sorry".

Jessie:  Yeah.

Whitney:  "I don't know who that is.  That's Photoshop".

Matt:  Shaggy, that's good.

Jessie:  For sure, for sure.

Matt:  Now, what happens if you are engaged in some type of a texting relationship, you've had the sexting, maybe you've even gone out on a date and the conversation through text just dries up?

Jessie:  Move on. Move on to the next one.

Matt:  Is that it?  But, you know, if you've sent, do you just give up if somebody's responded back?  Do you send another text message the next day?

Jessie:  You can send another one, if you want.

Matt:  What's too much.

Jessie:  3.

Matt:  Three text messages and no response in how long of a time?

Jessie:  Four days.

Matt:  Four days.

Whitney:  OK.  I have a little bit of a situation there, and I know that all three of you have heard this story before, but for the listeners we'll just go ahead anyways.  I was at a bar one night, a little bit intoxicated, I gave my number to a guy and we started texting, and after about five days, maybe a week of texting each other, I realized I was not texting the guy that I thought I was texting because I gave my number to two different people.  So I just cold turkey stopped talking to this guy.  I didn't want to have to explain myself.  It was a little bit embarrassing.  I'm like "I'll give it up.  Whatever".  I get a text message the next day.  "Hey, want to go to a baseball game?"  The next day "Hey, you want to hang out?"  The next day, "Hey, did you go back to the bar?"  The next day, "Hey, what about that baseball game?"  I get 13 text messages in a span of five days, all of them unresponded.  So after those 13 text messages in those five days, but three days later I got another one.  A couple days later I got another one.  This went on for almost three weeks.

Jessie:  That's insane.

Whitney:  That is crazy.  Like, there comes a time when you give up.

Matt:  When was the last time you got a text from him?

Whitney:   I have his number blocked now so I can't get text messages from him.

Matt:  Oh wow.  It got that far that you had to block him?

Whitney:  Yeah.

Matt:  But you didn't even, but what was the problem with just letting him know that there was a miscommunication?

Whitney:  I figured that if I dropped it then he'd stop talking.  Like, I didn't want to have to put in the effort.

Matt:  So to save embarrassment from yourself and him you just ignored the whole situation?

Whitney:  Yeah, like I do with most things in life.  Yes, that was exactly what happened.

Matt:  That's actually a pretty funny story.  Jessie, I believe you have a pretty funny story about texting.

Jessie:  Oh, I do?

James:  I think I know this story.

Matt:  I believe that Whitney gave you a number the other day to text.

Jessie:  Oh my goodness, yes.

James:  Whitney is the source of wrong numbers.

Jessie:  So this girl, Whitney..

Whitney:  This was not my fault.

Jessie:  Who decides she wants to hook me up with one of her friends gives him my number and he writes it down, is texting "me" all night long.

Whitney:  But he was showing me these text messages.  He's like "Look what she said".  It all sounded like stuff that Jessie would say.

Jessie:  So the next day I get to work and we're just chatting about it and she says "Oh, so you and so-and-so have been chatting, eh?" and I'm like "No".  She gives him the wrong number.

Whitney:  No.

Matt:  And this guy was engaged in a conversation with the wrong number?

James:  With a random?

Jessie:  A random.

Whitney:  I gave Cory the right number.

James:  No.

Whitney:  When he typed it into his Blackberry, he typed it in wrong.  It was not my fault.

Jessie:  Either/or.

Whitney:  It was Cory's fault.  See, that's why you need to call them.  If he called her, he would have known that it was the wrong person.

Jessie:  There you go.

Matt:  What are the chances that he got a hold of another Jessie Graham?

Jessie:  I think the person was just going along with it, like, pulling their chain.

Whitney:  Yeah, they were probably just screwing with him.  That's what I'm saying.  If Cory called her in the first place, he would have known.

Jessie:  But I wouldn't have answered.

Whitney:  And it goes back to that.  If I had called that guy from the bar in the first place then I would have known, and then I wouldn't have been stuck with those crazy text messages.

Jessie:  True, true.

Matt:  That's a very good point.  Maybe that's why you think like this now.

Whitney:  Probably.

James:  Aren't you glad he hasn't been calling you all those times?  Instead it was just texts.

Whitney:  I guess so, but I think that if he called me the first time I would have been like "Listen buddy, get lost.  I'm done with this.  Please move on".  It's always easier if you call.  Always.

Matt:  So Rodney, you got any text stories?

James:  Text stories?  Nothing that's related to what we're talking about, but I've definitely been that guy who sends texts to someone you're talking about instead of someone you're trying to talk to.  Yeah, that's always a fun one to get out of.  But you can think of a quick funny joke, it's OK.  But imagine that if you were trying to send a nude and you sent it to the wrong person.  That's something you'd definitely be careful of.

Jessie:  Yeah, see that's another thing.  Like, make sure before you send it, check.  Check who you're sending it to.

James:  That could be devastating.

Jessie:  10 times.  Double check.  Triple check.

James:  Yeah, I would definitely, you know what?  Also I would never, like, upload photos from my phone straight to Facebook because my phone's uploaded the wrong photo.

Jessie:  Oh, mine have too.  True.

James:  Yeah, and if you have photos on your, and then all of a sudden your notifications are blowing up within 30 seconds.

Matt:  Oh my God.

James:  I guess, so don't, delete your nudes after you take them because you're probably not going to need them again unless you recycle your nudes and that makes you a slut.

Jessie:  Or resourceful.

James:  Two, you've got to, well, Whitney says call and not text and Jessie says text and not call, so that's unconfirmed, but really you've just got to feel it out.  If the girl sends you a text then it's probably OK to text her.

Whitney:  If you like the person then they can call.

James:  I would say at least start out with texting.  Like, don't go straight for a phone call maybe.

Jessie:  Yeah, totally.  Totally.

James:  Maybe be like, all right, I'll call.

Jessie:  OK.  "Well, can I call you tonight?" or something.

James:  "I'll call you later in the week, about going out" or something like that.

Jessie:  Yeah, yeah, yeah.  For sure.  That's perfect.

James:  I'm trying to think of what else we talked about.  We could just sum it up.

Jessie:  Check out this rower guy's dick.

Whitney:  Henrich Rummel.

Jessie:  And leave a comment on gossipoverload.com on what you think it is.

James:  Exactly, sorry.  I didn't mean to cut you off.

Matt:  Also, if you are a Twitter user why don't you check out data-bytes.com?  You can get all of our Twitter information on there and you can start sending the girls some dick pics.

Jessie:  Yes, please.  I like big ones.

Whitney:  And they will go straight to gossipoverload.com.

Matt:  We could do that.  Why don't you guys check out dating-bytes.com.  Check out the social handles and why don't you get in contact with us guys?  And ladies as well.  If you want to send one to me and Rodney over here.

James:  I love boobs.

Jessie:  That's Rodney's Twitter, @iloveboobs.

James:  It's not, but I wish it was.

Matt:  Well thank you very much for listening everybody.  This has been another episode of Dating Bytes.  Tune in next time.  We'll be talking about even more controversial issues.  Until then, take care.

James:  Peace.


  • Mends

    Funny as hell!

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